“Really gotta hand it to them”: Bizarro “hands-on” saddle fetches £30 (plus £77 shipping) on eBay, but cyclist says “this looks much more comfortable than the dildo I’ve been riding on”; Van der Poel says “I’m lucky with my genes” + more on the live blog

I’m clueless, speechless. We finally have a worthy competitor to Chad Tavernia, you know, the “No Saddle Guy”, because if you ask me, I’d classify this as egregious as riding without a saddle.

The only matter is the identity of the cyclist who bought this “hands-on” saddle remains unknown…

But back to matters at hand, ahem, this truly whacky saddle, for those who’d like to have their posterior parts in safe hands, was flagged in our office chat (why, not your average office chat?) and has really taken all of us at the road.cc towers by surprise.

> Stocking thriller: The O-Seat is a bike saddle cover with a 'discreet pocket' for slipping in a vibrating sex toy

"Some freaky s***"

This latest eBay listing, titled “Rare 2005 Hands On Bicycle Bike Seat Hand Shaped 10 Fingers All Black”, was on sale for £30 from a seller named ‘vintage_overload’ in Orlando, Florida, with additional international shipping charges worth a whopping $100.

Those bummed out that this one has been sold, worry not, because it’d appear that it’s a rather popular thing on eBay, with two similar products available for purchase (for science, right?) for £54 and £48, plus shipping — the latter even coming with “peach-coloured” hands — if that’s what you’re into.

> "We have to buy this... for science": Cyclists in awe (and a bit scared) of £80 "handmade" auction bike found online that "the longer you look the weirder it gets", including bizarre "knee destroyer" cranks

Your live blog host, devoured by curiosity had to look this piece of work up, and I’ve come across a Reddit post with hilarious comments. Now, buckle up for some truly memorable live blog quotes…

“Knowing my luck, I'd hit a bump and jam one of the fingers into my a**hole.”

“Nothing I want more than a bike seat sexually harassing my a**.”

“We need more cupped seats on the market anyways.”

“This looks much more comfortable than the dildo I've been riding on for the last three years.”

It’s not like we haven’t come across weirder (read: worse) saddles before. Remember the O-Seat? No, no one? Well, that was the handiwork of live sex cam website CamSoda, featuring a ‘discreet pocket’ ideal for slipping in a Lovesense vibrating sex toy to offer an extra pleasurable ride.

Safe to say, we know what’s not making road.cc recommends Saddles of the Year list. Or maybe it is?

It’s a fact certainly not lost on many fans that Mathieu van der Poel is one of the best cyclists of this generation, and with the Milan-Sanremo heralding the first monument of the 2025 road racing season, we are about to see him take on the perhaps the best cyclist not only of this era, but of all time — Tadej Pogačar.

But it’s all quite well-known that both are two very different cyclists, in terms of nature and skill. The Dutchman, a puncheur, a master of one-day races (and cyclocross); while the Slovenian, an all-rounder with his niche cut out in both GC battles and classics.

Of course, another big difference is their body type and their weight. While Van der Poel weighs around 75 kilogrammes, Pogačar has a lighter build, around 10 kilos trimmer than the Alpecin-Deceuninck rider.

 

 

 

 

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A post shared by Alpecin-Deceuninck (@alpecindeceuninck)

So with Milan-Sanremo a key ambition for both the riders, does the difference in weight cause a concern to Van der Poel for tomorrow, and for the upcoming Ronde van Vlaanderen?

Apparently, no, the former world champion said in an interview to HLN (you know, the Flemish website recently under fire for accusations of being misogynistic). Why? It’s because of his genes, according to Van der Poel…

 “I’ve actually been at the same weight for a few months now,” he said. “I try to pay a little attention to it, but I’m lucky with my genes that I don’t have to pay extreme attention to it. I can still eat what I want sometimes. My weight is not something I obsess about.”

“Fortunately, for a rider of my type, it is not extremely necessary to push the limits in terms of weight. Only for the World Championships in Zurich last September did I really make an effort to lose weight, but for the rest of the year, I’ve actually weighed the same. I have been at my ideal weight since the winter.”

> Is Tadej Pogačar’s Paris-Roubaix debut off? Hell of the North “too dangerous” for world champion after Strade Bianche drama, as UAE Team Emirates boss warns “a bad crash could jeopardise the Tour de France”

To be fair, he is the grandson of the late great Raymond Poulidor, whose 1961 heroics Van der Poel emulated two years ago by stepping on the top step of the podium in Milan-Sanremo, seeing off a trademark Pogačar attack on the Poggio. And his father, Adri was no slouch either, winning the Tour of Flanders, Liege, Amstel, two Tour stages, and the Dutch national road championship... Decent genes, if I may.

Tadej Pogačar and Mathieu van der Poel at the 2023 Tour of Flanders (SWpix/Zac Williams)

Last year as well, Pogačar’s attack on the final climb was read well by the peloton, with the three-time Tour de France winner unable to shake off his pursuers and dragging a bunch on to the final bend by the famous Zampillo fountain, with Van der Poel eventually leading out his teammate Jasper Philipsen to victory.

> “Thanks for the lead-out”: Mathieu van der Poel helps teammate take Strava KOM from Filippo Ganna over Spanish climb

Is Van der Poel worried about the Tour of Flanders then, which could favour a lighter rider like Pogačar and deny him a chance to become the sole rider with the most number of wins at the race?

“In the Tour of Flanders you need a lot of strength and energy. I don’t want to try to lose another kilogram, with the risk of losing some strength,” he said.

Van der Poel added: “Milan-Sanremo is an important appointment in my race calendar. This race is one of my main goals for this season.”

With the very first edition of the women’s race also set to take place after its evolution from the Primavera Rosa, with Kopecky and Vollering also set to go toe-to-toe tomorrow, I think we’ll have two mighty races to watch tomorrow…

After last year’s Milan-Sanremo winner, Jasper Philipsen suffered a heavy crash at Nokere Koerse two days ago, the Belgian’s title defence was shrouded in mystery and doubt. However, it was announced yesterday that the sprinter, patched up and all, would be ready for the first monument of the year.

“It was a hard crash that I didn’t see coming, and I needed some time to determine whether I would be race-ready,” Philipsen said. “My hand was stitched the same evening at the Ghent UZ hospital, and all abrasions were treated with extra care. It’s far from comfortable, but luckily, the pain is not unbearable. I was already able to ride quite well on Thursday morning, without too much stiffness. So, I want to give it a shot.”

“Milan-Sanremo is never an easy race to win. Last year, everything fell into place for me, and I am very aware of that. Maybe the scenario will be completely different this year. But with Mathieu [van der Poel] and now Kaden [Groves] in the team, we have multiple options. I have confidence that we can achieve something as a team, and that is ultimately the most important thing."

He added: “Even if I never win another Monument, this will always be a race that remains special to me."

Jasper Philipsen wins 2024 Milan-Sanremo (Zac Williams/SWpix.com)

Meanwhile, Van der Poel has already emphasised how important tomorrow’s race is for him, and the Dutchman is confident about his form and chances, but still acknowledged the volatile nature of the race, thanks to the all-important ascent and then descent of Poggio.

“It’s for sure an unpredictable race," he said. “It’s no coincidence that everyone says it’s one of the Monuments that you can win without necessarily being the strongest rider. It all depends on what happens on the Poggio.

“The toughest moment is when the group is still together after the descent of the Poggio. You know attacks are coming. That might be the most dangerous moment of the race.

“Sometimes, it’s even better not to have the legs to attack yourself but just to follow when someone else makes a move. You don’t necessarily have to be the first over the Poggio to win Milan-Sanremo.

“I’m at an age where I have already achieved almost all of my goals, even more then that. That gives me a lot of peace of mind. Everything that comes now is a bonus, and that makes racing more enjoyable. But I still want to try and win the biggest races out there, another monument, so I'm still very motivated.”

Van der Poel wins Milan-Sanremo 2023

The 2023 Milan-Sanremo winner also shared what goes on in his head when tackling a climb as important and difficult as Poggio. “What do I focus on during the Poggio? Actually, nothing,” he said. “Everything happens so fast. Before you know it, you’re at the top, and then it’s full gas to the finish."

He concluded: “I’m aware that I need to be at 110 per cent to beat Pogačar. That’s always good motivation.”

Lovely to see so many cyclists going back from work this evening.

Summer's coming!

Where would you rather be? Stuck in a car, or experiencing the freedom of cycling? pic.twitter.com/WzdyAc2Ef6

— Chapona Bike (@ChaponaBike123) March 20, 2025

Now that’s put an itch in my back to get up and take my bike out for a spin…

Three guesses for anyone who can work out what TOM stands for…

Yep, that’s the name Q36.5 Pro Cycling have gone for their new documentary series comprising of five episodes, chronicling their new star-signing Pidcock’s journey with the team, with the first episode available to watch on YouTube now.

Anyone made their guesses yet? There, I’ll spare you. It’s ‘Team on Mission’.

A press release from the team reads: “This documentary takes viewers behind the scenes—before, during, and after the races. Episode one showcases Tom’s first victory with the team at the AlUla Tour and his bold, performance at Strade Bianche.”

“I have never made a wrong choice in my career, and this is definitely not one. Joining this team is probably the best decision I’ve ever made,” Tom says himself. “A rising tide lifts all boats.”

Popular camera cyclist, Mike van Erp, better known as CyclingMikey, has revealed that he’s reported a total of 103 drivers in this year. “A little fewer than usual,” he wrote, adding that he’s been unusually busy with work and hobbies.

He also offered some simple, easy-to-follow (you’d think) advice on how to avoid “sleepless nights” as a result of dealings with the police, Crown Prosecution Service and courts.

Responding to a social media user who asked him “how do you sleep”, the London-based cyclist wrote: “Why would I sleep badly? I'm not doing anything wrong, unlike the perps I catch. Stay off your phone, don’t drive badly, don’t run lights and don’t close pass cyclists, and you’ll be fine and you won't have to have sleepless nights over dealing with the police, CPS and courts.”